| As you can see from that chart, our odds of dying are 1:1. Yes 100% chance 0f dying. At this rate, we are doomed! |
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| The terrible incidents of Sept 11 2001 have shaken our confidence and made us realize that our feelings of security are nothing but illusory. |
Divided We Fall |
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As a response, new weapons and new warriors have been developed. What does this truly represent? Better means of protection or better means of destruction. |
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| It is clear that as literacy rates are going down among humans, animals are learning to read at a faster pace than ever. |
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| But what is truly worrisome, is not that they read so much, it has more to do with their choice of reading which is currently being documented by the Discordian Movement through tight monitoring of library loans and internet book orders worlwide. |
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| In the meantime, some of the species from the animal kingdom that appeared the most endearing and the less threatening have caused mass destruction such as a major tsunami in Indonesia and the flooding of New Orleans through advanced combat techniques such as the Butterfly Effect. |
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| Some species reproduce in a highly efficient manner and the worlwide population and geographic coverage of some species such as cockroaches or many rodents has outleagued the human race. Lurking in the shadows, they await their moment. |
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| All the while, the human race as long been infiltrated from the inside. As all good Discordians know, the world of humans truly is under the ultimate and total control of the Gnomes of Zurich. |
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| Through cunning and deceit they have recruited the most competent human surgeons in order to control reproduction of the race in an attempt at some form of evil eugenics. Their mental and social cunning is so extensive and subtle that some virile members of the male gender of the human race even sometimes undergo this procedure out of their own volition. |
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| But the gnomes of Zurich's mental and social control are even more deviant when it comes to controlling the female half of the human race. By now, they have convinced a significant portion of the stronger gender that sexual activity is pleasurable only in moderation and only when associated with feelings of love. This has lead to significant decreases in reproduction rates in selected parts of the world. The more educated the female, the more likely she will block sexual activity and keep reproduction at a minimum - sometimes even null - level. |
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| As for those offspring that are allowed birth, in-vitro mind control has transformed most of them as threats to their own race. |
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