Ok, sainthood has been the subject of many a Discordian scipture and writing and I will now let you in on the out-of-grid truth about Discordian saints. Out-of-grid means that this is not the true truth as interpreted through my own personal ultimate Rorshach but rather it is the true truth outside of any mind's mind and therefore it I should be recognised as the true truth. For those of you who do not need believe that there is such a thing as a true truth or who may, should there actually be such a thing as a true truth, either not get it or rather not get it from me -well- I strongly suggest those to reread the Principia Discordia, the Illustrated edition p. 23 and the Pentabarf. If some of you have no doubts after that, then become a witness or contact L. Ron Hubbard, obviously you were meant to be a believer. Has your pineal gland not been cleaned in a while? I have found that sex is the most efficient technique of cleaning up my own pineal gland. Particularly Deep Throat. Not by all the president's men preferably but hey! It's your gland! You do what you want with it. Although the recommended rate of pineal gland cleaning is once a month, there is no such thing as a pineal gland that is too cleaned. I personnally recommend deep throat twice a day for most effective results. Ok, so what about that true truth! He, hoser! In order for an individual and or and/or entity and or and/or being, living and or and/or dead and or and/or real and or and/or fictitious and or and/or other, male and or and/or female and or and/or other, to be made a saint, that individual and or and/or entity and or and/or being must have been cited or talked about at least once in Discordian scriptures, directly and or and/or indireclty, with a proper and or and/or an adapted and or and/or paraphased quote. Belief in the sanctity of an individual and or and/or entity and or and/or being must be shared by at least one Discordian and hirself. With the exception of the 5 Apostles of Eris, the more agreement there is about the sanctity of a candidate, the lower the level of sainthood that should be recognized. Any living pope can be made a Saint without any ceremony, whether cited or not, but such a pope has to accept to give up its Saint spot once dead unless someone else proposes to maintain the candidate and nobody seconds the otherwize motion.  An explanation of why the candidate deserves sainthood would be appreciated but is rarely necessary. Given that Discordians love statutory holidays, Saints birthday should be modified on a date for which there is no current holiday. For Saints who were naughty and or and/or who died gunned down and or and/or who died while having sex, then the date of death can be retained. Any Discordance about the sanctity of a Saint should be seen as true Discordian endorsement. Swimsuit models or playmates are automatically accepted as Saints as long as they have either Fenderson or McKenzie as part of their full canonised name. Any Saints rejected from other orders due to lack of actual existence are admitted upon paying admission fees. Pete Rose is invited to present is candidature but we recommend him not to bet on it.